A Letter to the SMU Class of 2029

You will be going to college soon, maybe moving across state lines, miles away from your home. You’ll feel the regular pressures of choosing a major and taking college-level courses. You’ll want to make friends live out what everyone says about college, that it is the best time of your life. However, sometimes you may feel conflicted between having fun and remaining devout in your faith. At times, I felt like I was living a double life, like drinking at frat parties and then going to my Bible study on Tuesdays. I’m here to tell you about my journey as a Christian in college, and hopefully provide some advice along the way.

            According to Christian Standard Magazine, 50 to 80 percent of college students walk away from their faith during their years at a university. I definitely would have been one of those students. I would have been a statistic, if it were not for one person.

            Similar to the “Hero’s Journey” principle in cinematic arts, we are all in need of a mentor. We need someone to guide us, ground us, and listen to us, especially in college. What is so special about college is that your mentor through your journey does not have to be an elder or a professor. It can be a friend, someone who understands what you are going through, can sympathize, and offer educated support.

            For me, it was my best friend, Korey Vita, who I met during the first week of our freshman year, in our community engagement class. He was a small-town kid from McKinney, Texas, with big dreams, excited to be at SMU, but nervous about making friends in a whole new city. I was a naive girl who had just moved across the country from San Diego, California, to attend a university where I knew no one. We were so different, and yet, I have never met anyone who gets me like he does. We immediately gravitated toward each other and have been inseparable ever since. We have the same sense of humor, which is problematic, because we laugh non stop when we are together, and can’t seem to be productive for even one minute. We even have an inside joke that we “make each other worse people.” However, that could not be further from the truth.

            Korey has been instrumental in helping me foster a stronger relationship with the Lord throughout college. I was just like any other California party girl my freshman year. I went out every week to bars where the fraternities would rent out venues. We would wear tiny bodysuits and cut-off shorts, dressing like we had just stepped off the set of Jersey Shore. Now, I am not ashamed of my extracurriculars as a freshman. I do not wish to change anything about my story, since it is my past that eventually led me closer to God.

I was a lost college girl, hoping flaky frat guys would like me, but I also had a best friend who was looking out for me. Regardless of my weekend activities, Korey would always text me and say, “We’re going to church tomorrow, right?” This might not seem like such an impactful gesture, but it meant the world to me. It truly changed my life.

            From Korey’s consistency and care for me, I not only began to care for myself more, but I also became more accepting of God’s love.

Before coming to college, I was very amateur in my faith. I was raised in a Presbyterian church that would solely preach about the gospel every Sunday, but never straight from the Bible. Then, my family switched to a non-denominational rock church. You know the type? It was more like a dance hall with a stage, where a highschool band would practice their “jams,” with flashing multicolored lights. It was not an ideal place to grow closer to God and reflect on my relationship with Him, if you ask me.

It was not until I attended Park Cities Presbyterian Church (PCPC) in Oak Lawn that I finally began to understand the importance of reading God’s Word. Our relationship with Him can always become deeper, and I was camping out in the surface area of faith, until Korey brought me to PCPC.

After church shopping which seemed like it took a whole semester, we finally found PCPC and I started to learn what it means to have my own relationship with the Lord, separate from my parents, and my family at home.

Then, we joined a Christian group on our campus. For the two years prior to discovering PCPC, I travelled between the different Chirstian groups on SMU’s campus.

FOCUS, Stumo, Young Life, you name it. I’ve tried it. I struggled with these Christian groups for one reason or another. Sometimes, I felt like the girls in these groups would judge me for being in a sorority. I felt like I would immediately get labeled as a party girl. It felt as though they did not want to get to know me, as if they thought I was not saved or something. I want you to know, if anyone makes you feel this way, they are way out of their wheelhouse. No one can determine who is saved or worth saving, but our Lord and Savior. So, if judgmental college girls make you feel that way, don’t listen to them. You are worth it. That is the whole point of “come as you are.”   

I am so blessed that Korey never judged me and always wanted to help me develop my faith relationship even further. For a long time, Korey was my Christian group. He kept me afloat and grounded at the same time. I am so grateful to have had a friend in college with whom I could speak about my faith freely. We helped each other, and answered each other’s questions.

Eventually, however, we were able to expand and find a group of our own, Reformed Christian Fellowship (RUF). RUF is a campus ministry that is connected to our church. Many of our friends attend RUF, and Korey and I have brought some friends too. Now that I am graduating in two weeks, I finally feel like I found my Christian network on campus.

My hope for you is that you find that friend you trust, with whom you can talk about the real stuff. College is a blast, but it can be overwhelming. When it is, sometimes our faith is the thing we sacrifice. When you're feeling lost in college, just know, everyone else is too. But, you’re the lucky one because you will have your faith to turn to for support and love.